Ophelia & Hamlet … the lost first draft

Shakespeare’s lost first draft of the scene between Ophelia and Hamlet where he denies ever having loved her.

ACT III

SCENE I. A room in the castle.

Hamlet:
I did love you once. Even though your ears are enormous.

Ophelia:
(Ears erect, eyes wide with surprse). Indeed, my lord, you made me believe so. And my ears are not enormous.

Hamlet:
You should not have believed me, for your giant ears cannot so
inoculate our old stock but we shall relish our long floppy ears. I loved you not.

Ophelia:
(Growling) I was the more deceived.

Hamlet:
Get thee to a puppery, why woulds’t thou be a breeder of
bat-eared sinners? What? Ophe—–

Ophelaia:
(Mauls Hamlet for his insensitivity)

End of scene.

For those wondering, Ophelia is 12 weeks old, she weighs a mere 8 pounds +/-, she is a corgi/Australian cattle dog and she needs a foster in Nashville. If you can foster this dog, email [email protected] If you are wondering if I am drinking heavily, alas, I am not.

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